Friday, December 31, 2010

2011: A Year of Change

Well boys and girls, we've had a fun time, haven't we?

2010, come and gone again, as fast as the wind is swift, as fleeting as the dragonfly's wings, as joyful and sorrowful and peaceful as a summer thunderstorm.

I have not changed a whole lot. Which is not to say I haven't tried, or have not the idea of change in mind, but a lesson I have learned is to try and to be are not one in the same, ever.

To change, I have to BE the change, not try to be the change.

This is going to be a year of change.

I haven't told many people this yet, but I'm not coming back as an RA next year, for reasons of my own and for the reasons of others. But that is a conversation to have in person, not something to discuss via web. If anyone sees this and wants to know what's up, call/text me.

I also am working as a wellness assistant in the gym, so I will be exercising close to every day. I will be getting a roommate. I will be getting a job at the brookstone in albany. I will writing every day, reading, acting, directing, and improving.

I will not be tolerating bullshit anymore, or falsities, or anything that seems to diminish or worsen my life. I will be making an effort to call it as it is, and be direct and honest even if it may hurt sometimes, myself or another.

I will not be good at this, not right away. I am my own natural enemy to change.

But I will follow this mantra, as another writer did before. I read this and was inspired. I hope this will be the mantra for my coming year, in everything I do:

I am my own enemy.
Resistance is my nature

I am aware of Resistance
And it prevents me from achieving the life I am meant to have

Resistance is self-generated, self-perpetuated
It Lies and Seduces. Its goal is my Utter Destruction
Every day is a battle for my soul.

This Moment. This Day.
I change my life.

Help me to defeat myself
and realize Fate.

A little schmaltzy? A little too much feel-good, peace loving, hippy dippy kind of mentality?

Maybe. But it's going to help me focus, and going to help me become the person I want to be, and I need to be.

As the writer, Jonathan Hickman says:

Tonight is the night I "stop being a dabbler, and become a creator."

You hear that 2011?

Right then. Let's do this.

2010, An Ending

Another year, another blog post.

2010, another year of fun, stress, comics, comedy, theatre, improv, work, writing, reading and so much more.

I don't have any words of wisdom at the moment; that will most likely come later on tonight when I am full of spirits, wistfulness, and nostalgia.

For the moment, all I'll say is this:

2010, you were a stepping stone into my third decade on this earth. We had some laughs, we cried a little bit, and nothing larger then a small tragedy made its way to my doorstep.

Thanks. Take care of yourself.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Something About Me Being Home

I am home.


That is all.

:: walks away ::

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

:: walks back, stomping angrily, grumbling ::

No. Y'know what? I want to review this semester just to see how much work I actually fr*aking did to show myself how insane my life has been.

-Worked and ended two jobs
-Did two weeks of training for reslife
-worked two ten hour days in the sun to move in new residents
-started taking 5 full academic courses
-12 weekday duties and 3 weekend duties
-Ran the Sketchy Characters club
-Helped put on at least 12 weekend shows, publicity stunts and a great PAC show
-Visited NYC with the Sketchys
-Acted in two theatrical productions, Prolix and Macbeth
-Had a new One-Act staged and performed
-Wrote my first 50,000 word novella
-Too many other small things to remember
-Read 11 Novels

Yeah . . . that's what I thought.

Pardon me while I pass out from exhaustion.

Monday, December 6, 2010


So Blog, I am back in the saddle.

And by back in the saddle, I mean I looked at my toolbar and saw that your link had gathered dust and feral internet creatures, guarding you fiercely so I, the abusive Master and Creator and Abandoner of thee, would not come back and harm you again.

I vanquished them to the trash bin, and now we are friends again.

Apparently, I have a beard now, and it is red and pointy and annoying and manly.

It was for Macbeth, which just closed this weekend and all in all it was a very amazing experience. I got my chance to play a serious role for the first time, which was a great challenge, as well as working in an arena theatre, in the round. The audience is RIGHT THERE, and it was very discomforting in the beginning but grew intimate and awesome as hell.

But things are grand. I completed Nanowrimo! 50,000 word novel, all done!

(The goal, not the book. But the book is coming.)

Now, I go to sleep, maybe, but hey, I'll be back soon Blog.

Stay classy.